All too often, people judge decisions made by themselves or others as right or wrong. This way of thinking is conditioned into us by our friends and family when we are kids. While there is nothing wrong with thinking about doing something beneficial for yourself or others, the truth is that there are no right or wrong decisions.

We are raised to do what is good and avoid what is bad. This is a flawed premise, as the concept of good and bad is entirely subjective.

We see a prime example of this in men who struggle with girls. They hesitate to approach because it's not the right time, or they don't say something because it may be the wrong thing to say.

When you think in terms of right or wrong, you limit yourself so much. Here are two big reasons why there are no right or wrong decisions in life.

1. Purposefully limiting your experience

How often have you actually learned from your past mistakes? As in, how many of your past mistakes have you made progress towards not repeating? Many people struggle with this because they see things as right or wrong. They never go beyond the surface level.

When you think of things in terms of right or wrong, you end up limiting what you experience. Rather than being able to take in the full scope, you only get the surface level.

In every situation, there is something that you can do better and something(s) that you did well. Thinking in terms of right or wrong will blind you to one or the other of these, if not both.

But, how will you ever know what you need to improve at or what you are already good at if you're focused on making the right or wrong choice? 

Rather than looking beyond the present moment, you need to be fully present and paying attention. 

I once read in a book that if you are worried about the future, you are anxious and if you are worried about the past, you are depressed. You have the choice to be anxious, depressed, both, or neither.

When you wrap your head around the idea that there are no right or wrong decisions, you will be able to stop worrying about the past or future and focus on the present moment in front of you.

2. True authenticity

Pay attention to those you know who are the most authentic, and you'll notice they have little to no filter. This doesn't mean that they have socially unacceptable behaviors, this just means that they find the balance between being unfiltered and being socially acceptable. 

I've preached the importance of balance before, and this situation is no exception. In order to find the balance between authenticity and social acceptance, you need to stop thinking in terms of right or wrong.

As social animals, we all crave social acceptance. Social acceptance is a big part of our mental wellbeing. However, we also want to be ourselves around others.

Growing up, we are told to tone ourselves down and be more sensitive to the needs of others. As a result, we tuck away who we are in order to raise up others.

The problem with this is everybody's doing it, so nobody gets to shine when the spotlight is put on them. 

In order to gain true authenticity, you want to shift the way you think. Rather than thinking in terms of right or wrong, you want to think in terms of want, benefit, and harm.

Do you want to do this? What benefit do you gain from doing this? Will you harm anybody, mentally or physically, by doing this? Do you care if they become hurt by this?

If you don't want to do it, is the benefit worth it to you? What do you have to give up to obtain that benefit? 

For too long, we have been told to suppress our desires. People then wonder why so many people are depressed when we are in what seems like prisons of our own making.

Nobody knows you better than yourself. Only you know what you truly need from moment to moment. When we let right or wrong dictate what we should or shouldn't want, we begin to live inauthentic lives.

Living a life that's inauthentic is a miserable experience, and the easiest way to misery is to live somebody else's idea of your life.

 Live and learn for your sake

The first thing you experience in this life is yourself and the reality you see. Growing up, we are told to suppress this reality to cater to the reality of others.

Through this upbringing, we are taught to think in terms of right and wrong as a means of policing our actions even when our teachers and parents aren't around. Even worse, we are told to thank them for this because they are guiding us.

The only thing this guides us to is a life of inauthenticity and social anxiety. Rather than keeping down your authentic self with thoughts of right and wrong, start seeing thins as they are in the present moment.

- Karl