Have you ever met somebody who was too serious to have fun with? Unfortunately, that describes too many people in the modern day. Many people have forgotten what it means to have fun, especially with others. This is a problem when it comes to conversations, as people want to enjoy themselves. This is why you want to turn as many things as you can into play.

The fact of the matter is that very few things need to be taken so seriously. In fact, very few things need to be taken seriously at all.

Yet too many people, men especially, take things seriously when they don't need to. This leads to the problem of men having shit social skills.

Here, we don't tolerate shitty social skills. Here are two big ways to turn as many things as you can into play.

1. Laugh more, brood less

It's been scientifically proven that smiling uses fewer muscles compared to frowning. Unless you plan on strengthening your facial muscles, you need to learn to relax more. Laughing more while brooding less is the perfect antidote for those who don't yet have a grasp on being playful.

Now, I'm not saying to be a maniac who laughs randomly. What I am saying is to create more situations where you can laugh.

Whether this means using humor or using reframing, the end result will be the same. Your aim is to laugh instead of frown.

To give an example, let's say that you approach a girl and she's bitchy right off the gate. You use a simple opener and she responds with, "Is that seriously the best you've got?"

Most guys would get stuck at this point. What she said is upsetting, but reacting with those upset feelings would only make things worse for them.

The best way to respond in this scenario is to smile, laugh, and give an 'agree & amplify' response.

As an example, your response could be, "Oh no, you figured me out! You're so smart." Or, you could say something like, "My bad, just woke up so I'm still a little sleepy. Thanks for waking me up!"

Once you've said your response, you can either lean into it more or move on to the next part of the conversation. Personally, I like to move on after the response as this shows that I'm only messing around with my response.

Once you get the hang of laughing more and brooding less, you'll be able to turn almost any misfortune you face into a fun moment.

2. Absurdity & Exaggeration

Think of the last time somebody overexaggerated something. They probably used an example that was pretty outlandish and over the top. No matter the purpose of it, the fact remains that absurdity & exaggeration tends to capture our attention. When interacting with others, this is no exception.

Making use of these two is quite simple. You say something that doesn't line up, you exaggerate using your non-verbals, or both put together.

As mentioned, the big reason to use either of these is to more easily capture attention. By capturing attention, you can more easily direct your audience towards the message of what you are saying rather than the literal words.

When using absurdity, the aim is to say something that fits in so poorly with what's already been said that the other person automatically assumes you're joking.

For example, let's say you approach a girl and call her beautiful, then you ask her to go mud wrestling with you tomorrow after lunch. The thought of a beautiful girl wrestling in mud is so uncommon that she'll automatically assume you're joking.

As for exaggeration, the aim is to say something that could be taken seriously, but the tone of voice you use is so exaggerated that it's obvious you aren't being serious.

For example, let's say you just finished eating a meal and the waiter asks you how it was. You could respond with something like," It was terrible, that's why I finished it all for you guys!" The two things don't add up, to the point that it's obviously a joke.

An important thing to note is that when using either of these, expression plays a big role. Sometimes you need a big grin on your face, sometimes you can get away with a poker face.

The key is to use an expression that you believe will fit the joke. However, if you're not sure you can always default to a big grin.

Fun is for adults too

When we become adults, we are told to be more mature and serious. Well, take a look at the adults of the modern day and try to convince me that the majority of them are happy.

Too many people drain the fun out of their lives because it fits the narrative they've been sold. They then seek that fun in others who have also let the fun drain away.

If you can become that person who brings the fun, you automatically have an unfair advantage that benefits everybody you come across. So, get out there and have some fun!

- Karl