Change is slow, be patientNov 22, 2023
In this era, many people want things and they want them ASAP. Many people don't know that change is slow, so they should be patient.
In this post, we'll be going over these points that cover why change is slow:
- Habits die hard
- Change is scary
- Understanding comes with time
Old Habits Die Hard
Ever had an experience where you tried to stop doing something you knew you shouldn't do? Or had a hard time doing something you knew you should do? Both of these stem from the same root, which is that you are too used to doing something else instead of what you're aiming to do.
The more you do something, the better you get at it. This can work in your favor and against you at the same time.
If the habit you pick up is a good habit, it becomes that much easier to sustain that good habit. You'll end up leading a life impacted by that habit.
If the habit you pick up is detrimental, it becomes that much harder to do things that go against that habit. The impact of this habit will be felt a lot more in the short term compared to a beneficial habit.
Change is slow because we have habits that prevent us from making the necessary progress. Even the absence of a habit can make it hard to pick up a habit.
Whatever the case is, your habits do not go away so easily. In order to get rid of a habit, you must consistently disengage from the behavior associated with it.
This is harder than it sounds and requires a significant amount of mental control. However, once you have it it becomes that much easier to tone down.
One easy way to make it easier to destroy old habits is to break them down into smaller parts. This shows you that you can do it, which builds the momentum that will allow you to reach your end goal.
Whatever approach you take, old habits die hard. It's best if you take them apart piece by piece over time.
Change is scary and slow, be patient and bold
It's never easy doing something scary. I can remember the first time I approached a girl I was interested in. I was terrified, yes, but it was a very exhilarating experience. Through this kind of repeated experience, I learned something crucial: never let fear stop you.
It is indeed scary to take the first step, especially when there's nobody to show you where to go. We'd all much rather have stable footing when going through life, after all.
Sometimes, however, you need to have courage. Sometimes, you need to take the plunge and do what you must.
Finding the strength to take action even in the face of fear is the hallmark of being a man. But I won't just leave you with that, I'm going to give you some ways to make those scary steps a little more digestible.
First, don't do everything all at once. As mentioned earlier, you want to break the process down into smaller parts.
When you do too much all at once, you are setting yourself up for failure. You create this expectation for yourself that is too much at the beginning, which makes it very easy for you to burn out before you even really begin.
Second, do it at least twice before you think about giving up at all. Whatever you're trying to do, whether it be a smaller part or a bigger part, try it out at least two times.
I found that after a few attempts, it became a lot easier to approach girls, even if it didn't completely go my way. By taking action and seeing that it didn't end horribly, I was able to convince myself that it's nowhere near as bad as I think it is.
When you want to tackle changing yourself, take it slowly but boldly. You don't want to rush yourself, but you also don't want to hesitate too much.
Crucial Understanding comes over time
Think back to a time when you knew something but couldn't explain it in words. You knew it when you saw it, but didn't have the words for it. This is the kind of understanding that I'm talking about. This understanding doesn't come overnight, but it is worth all the investment.
All knowledge works in a circular fashion. The first lessons given to the beginner become the daily mantra of the master.
The difference between the master and the beginner is the level of understanding that the master has compared to the beginner. This difference in understanding allows the master to have the fluid free-form style of the beginner with the knowledge and grace that suits a master.
This level of understanding only becomes possible with repeated practice and exposure. It is only by exposing yourself to the proper experience that you obtain the instinctual understanding of the master.
Change is slow because this state of mastery is the state that most people would rather be in. If this is the state that you are in when doing something stressful, you'll spend less energy when doing it. And the body loves to conserve energy.
Only by being diligent and consistent with your actions will you be able to achieve the required understanding. Stick to the process and eventually, you'll get your change and more.
Change is slow, so enjoy the process
Yes, we have our goals. Yes, we want things in life. However, don't forget to enjoy the process.
There are many lessons to pick up and experiences to have along the way. If you aren't paying attention along the way, you'll miss out on these and the end goal becomes more hollow.