Mental Health always comes before improvementSep 30, 2023
In this day and age, so many people push themselves towards greater heights. They seek improvement and challenge in so many areas that they are invested in. As noble and productive of pursuit as this is, for most people, the changes will not be permanent. They simply do not have the prerequisite groundwork done for the structure to last. They do not know that mental health always comes before improvement.
This isn't to say you can't improve at all if you don't have good mental health. It simply means that, unless your mental health improves at the same time, the improvement will be short-lived.
Due to the nature of our instant-gratification society, too many people don't know how to achieve permanent good mental health. As a man, it is essential for you to have near-impenetrable mental health.
Luckily, there are easy ways to achieve outstanding mental health. Here are the two things you can do to ensure your mental health is always solid before you make any improvement.
1. Squeezed like a vice
Look around you and you'll find people who have vices. You have them, I have them, everybody has them. Nobody is saved from this reality. As depressing as this may sound, it isn't all gloom. In fact, we can use this fact to our advantage.
I'll keep it 100% real with you: perfection is not only unrealistic but overrated. Those who strive for it are never happy, and I'm sure you want to be happy.
Based on this logic, why then do so many people pursue perfection while complaining about it? Put simply, we've been convinced as a society that it's normal for people to be perfect.
Just take one look at social media. Everybody you look at has the perfect life, the perfect body, the perfect relationship, and so on and so forth. We've been brainwashed into thinking the average person is perfect.
In reality, not only is the average person not perfect, but nobody is. No matter how prestigious or glamorous someone may be, we all have our vices.
The key here is not to be ashamed of our vices but to accept that we have them and find ways to push them out of our lives over time.
The faster you try to get rid of the negatives from your life, the faster they slingshot back in. This can lead to feelings of failure and inadequacy.
Keeping yourself motivated enough to keep trying is very important to making lasting change. For this reason, you will need to properly pace yourself.
To maximize your results, you need to get rid of your vices slowly while tempering your self-criticism and expectations. There will always be tomorrow so if you fail today, analyze where you went wrong, devise a strategy, and try again tomorrow.
The pursuit of perfection in combination with your vices will lead you to a dark place. They will continuously reinforce that you aren't enough and that you may never be.
To let them go, you must be patient and forgiving with yourself, while also understanding why and how you are getting rid of your vices.
2. Attitude = altitude, mentality = attitude
How many people do you know that have a terrible attitude? Chances are they're very unpleasant to hang around. You want to get away from them the moment they try talking about anything negative because you know it'll just be a torrent of angry rambles. We can't do much to change these people, but we can do a lot to prevent ourselves from being like that.
I recently watched a YouTube short that gave a very powerful analogy for attitude. After watching it a few times and reading the comments, I came to a conclusion and translation that makes sense.
The analogy goes like this: if you squeeze an orange, orange juice will always come out. Doesn't matter how hard you squeeze, how often you squeeze, or in what way you squeeze, the oranges will always give orange juice.
The oranges always give orange juice because that's what's in them. If you don't want orange juice, change it out for a different fruit. Now, let's extend the analogy.
If something happens to you, and you are filled with anger, hatred, bitterness, or anxiety, then that's what will come out. If you are filled with negative emotions, then your reaction will be comprised of those negative emotions.
For the majority of people, we don't like responding this way. We want to be peaceful and happy, not angry or bitter.
The solution is simple: you must simply swap out those negative emotions for the ones you want.
What I got from this analogy is that we have the power to choose how we respond to any situation. However, we need to have the right mindset first.
Without the right mindset, we don't get to have the right attitude. Mindset is what drives our actions and opinions, and attitude is simply a side-effect of our actions and opinions.
When the majority of people have a mindset that causes them to have actions and opinions that are destructive, socially or otherwise, it's no wonder that they may struggle with being the way they want in life.
You are entitled to your own opinions and actions, but so are others. You must find the balance between holding your ground and giving enough leeway to others in your life.
I firmly believe that a good mentality will always lead you to greater heights on its own, as a good mentality can lead you on a journey altogether. It is up to you to choose to be open to that change for it to happen.
The difference between boys and men
The main thing separating boys from men is simply the way they behave. Boys are immature and unable to take hardships or challenges, while men embrace difficulty and find solutions.
In other words, the difference between a boy and a man is good mental health. Without good mental health, it is infinitely harder to embrace difficult moments and find solutions in the chaos.
The foundation that good mental health lays is so valuable and the benefits feel like cheat codes. It is a journey to acquire it, but it is well worth it.