All too often, people want to make big strides without knowing how to take small steps. You must know how to crawl before you learn to walk. When it comes to ourselves, it is no different. How can you know where you want to go in life if you never take the time to discover yourself?

It is in no way your fault if you don't have a strong sense of what you want. That journey is a part of life.

In case nobody has encouraged you to walk that path yet, let me be the first to encourage you. Self-discovery is a wonderful thing that will help you become the best version of yourself.

When you decide to take the time to discover yourself, it can be challenging to know what to do. Here are a few tips to help you stay on track.

1. Start with why

As with anything, the first step is the hardest here. Knowing how to start is always helpful when deciding your path. The easiest way to know where to go is to start with why.

Why do you want to do that? Why do you want what you want? Why do you want to avoid this or that challenge?

Starting with why allows you to go to the root of your motivation. You get to find what really drives you if you go deep enough.

The best way to go about this is to ask why until the answer is stripped down to a core motivation.

For example, say you want to exercise. Why? To get in shape. Why? To look better. Why? To have better chances with girls. Why? So you can get a girlfriend. Why? To have a relationship. Why? To start a family one day. 

By going deep like this, you find out more about yourself which really shows the kind of person you are. Knowing this information will make it infinitely easier to make better decisions.

If you want to dig deeper into this, I recommend reading Start with why by Simon Sinek.

2. Apply inward focus to your why

I talked about inward focus in a previous post. It's for stuff like this that it really shines. It's one thing to know your why. It's another to act upon it wisely. 

Starting with why and applying inward focus are the two main steps to self-discovery. If one isn't working, the other one loses a lot of its effectiveness.

So you've started with why and found it. Fantastic! Now what?

It's important to keep in mind that you must be acting upon what you want to do rather than what others want you to do. If you don't do this then your life becomes miserable very fast.

Self-discovery is done in order to find what you want to do. It's no good if you're still doing what others tell you to do instead.

Once you've found your why you must apply inward focus to it so you actually stick to it. Only by doing this will you discover who you are.

3. End with how

All too often we start with how when how is the easiest and least important step. There's no point in a working car if there's no gas in the tank. Always make sure you take the time to discover your why before finding how.

It's been said before but it bears repeating; measure twice, cut once. Knowing how to do something means nothing if you aren't sufficiently prepared.

We end with how - meaning we figure out how before setting out - in order to make sure we are actually going to see through what we set out to do.

I've found that if I have trouble with executing the how it's because there's more to the why I haven't dug up yet. That undiscovered part of the why is often what holds you back.

It's for reasons like this that we delay how until why is crystal clear.

Focus less on how and more on why; focusing on why will lead you to the how.

4. Enjoy the journey

Finally, once you've done all the prep work before the journey, there are only two things left to do: set out and enjoy! 

Way too many people take life far too seriously. They're tense all the time and don't take any time to really de-stress and relax. Even the people who seem most relaxed can be extremely stressed out.

When you set out to discover yourself, enjoy the journey. Don't get hung up on mistakes, and don't worry about making all the right choices. 

Just enjoy the process and learn as much as you can. This way, you pick up lessons you otherwise wouldn't have.

Every experience is potentially one that can teach you something new, so stay open to a lot of them.

Take the time to discover your life

By acquiring a true understanding of who you are, you will finally be able to bring your consciousness into subconscious decision-making. Taking the time to discover yourself is all about getting those two on the same page after all.

Ultimately, taking this journey will lead you to discover what your purpose is. You can't know what you're meant to do if you don't know yourself deeply enough.

- Karl